No turkey in this oven. Or, I am the turkey Since David and I both worked on Thanksgiving, I was going to make us a turkey breast today with "the trimmings," as they say. But I got involved in a project this morning and spent four hours pulling ribbon through paper and then glueing it to matte board, but that's another story all togther. Since it's David's only day off, he wanted to go out and buy some toys for a friend of his who is taking donations for church. So we had to go out. And I needed to go to a paper store and then get some groceries if I was going to cook all that stuff. Call me the Queen of Almost. It was 2 when we left the house. We'd only had breakfast, so while we were wandering the toy aisles at Target, both our heads started to hurt and our stomachs were growling. We bought some very cool stuff -- some people even commented on it. A medeivel castle set, a football, a basketball game, a 3-foot long tractor trailer filled with matchboxy cars, a Tonka truck you put together and can paint and something else that I can't remember. Even though I think boy toys suck, I kind of admire the stuff David picked out. I got a girl Barbie, a boy Barbie (Steven!), a princess castle set and my favorite -- a ballerina (pink, of course!) sleeping bag in a backpack with a flashlight and a little water bottle. The toys were very cool. But this is about the turkey. So we were starving when we left Target and unlike the one right near our house, this Target didn't have a Taco Bell in it. So we drive down to Taco Bell to get a taco to hold us over till we got home to cook the turkey. Only on the way there, I said, "We could just get dinner out." It wasn't that I didn't want to cook, it was just that it was 4:45 and the turkey had to cook for about 2 hours. We went back and forth and finally decided I'd cook the turkey. So we head home (I was going to get it started and David would run over to the store to pick up the stuff we needed). I get out the roasting pan, the rack and take the turkey out of the fridge. I look on the back to see what temperature to use. Then I noticed the chart. I think the turkey breast is 6 pounds. Or maybe 5. The chart says a 5-6 pounder has to cook for 3.5 to 4 hours. It's 5:30. We're so not having turkey for dinner.